Excuses

Usually there are so many things I want to say, but I am unable to say them. Not because I fear the consequences of my thoughts, but because my mind cant seem to take my jumbled feelings and allow them to exit  in some type of orderly fashion.

Instead of saying how I feel, I have allowed rage and my untamed temper do the talking.  I have let my inability to convert my thoughts into words, constructive, positive words, control me. I have let my anger consume me!

What I allow to escape my mind is never truly all of me; its never honestly all I feel. But for some reason the poison inside me takes over causing destruction all around. You cant run from it…I’ve tried.

This evil is apart of me.

I’m sure there are reasons I am unable to express myself in better ways. Or maybe they are just excuses….

 

“Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.” – Sigmund Freud

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One thought on “Excuses

  1. No sweetie they aren’t just excuses, you carry some baggage you are going to have to unpack one day, when your ready. Let me share something your Nana Payne taught me. I was very upset (my heart had been hurt) and my mouth was going a mile a minute. She said calm down and listen to me, turn around. There stood my 2 babies, do you want them to react the same way you are when they are faced with a similar situation? Of course I didn’t. Then you have to find a different way; for their sake. She was a Very Wise woman. You are in my prayers.

    Liked by 1 person

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